Glasses

CHILDHOOD TRAUMA MAKES US COPE IN OUR OWN WAY 

When I say I use glasses to cope , Im not talking about small tall glasses filled with Californian wine , as nice as that sounds . Im talking about getting a bit older , I was for a few years in denial , I squinted at ingredient lists , read the newspaper like a spy ,close to my face covering my face and nodded in approval at whatever my kids showed me from TickTock on their phones, despite not being able to tell if it was a puppy or a naked body.

Then I took the plunge , that’s probably the wrong word, more like I took a small step and used some reading glasses that I bought in a chemist when I thought no one was about. The trouble with taking that tiny step is that once you start using glasses for reading , even occasionally it creeps into every time you read. I watched an interview with Harrison Ford , he was peering over a pair of glasses , I thought if its ok for Indiana Jones then perhaps I could look mature like a nice cheese and not like a rotting peach. So I had an eyesight test , gone are those physical over glasses they put on you and pop in and out different lenses , with a ” which one looks clearer” they always looked the same to me anyway. Now its like the sick bay on the Starship Enterprise , machines predict your eyesight test and run letter identification tests , take pictures, blow into your eyes , I did think the Optician could have gone off and had a nice coffee.

My results weren’t that bad and I opted to buy lots of glasses from a well known online international store . Now there is a point to all of this , as interested as you are in my eyesight ( not), Im getting to the point ……and that is coping . I loose everything , I have an apple air tag on important things so I can always find them ,( my wife refused to wear one), I knew that I would never find my new glasses , so I bought loads. I leave a pair in places I know I will need them , the ones Im using now are left on the kitchen table where I often write. One set is left in the car , one on the bedside table and so on…. The point is I know I don’t function like other people , so I do things to cope with that.

WE CAN BE A BIT  DIFFERENT

Adults that have been through childhood trauma also don’t always function the same as other people and they may use their own coping techniques to help. Im not really talking about addictions here , we know that can also be a likely outcome , Im talking about those little quirks, like leaving my glasses everywhere.

For me I find my mind is active at bedtime , trauma survivors live in the multiverse ,by that I mean they think of every eventuality , every possible outcome and relive every possible meaning of a conversation they might have had that day. Im a little like this, so to cope I put on talk radio at night when I go to bed and then I can sleep , If I wake up in the night I pop an EarPod in and start again. It’s not great , but it’s a little way of how I cope . If I go out to a show I will choose an end seat , its a small thing but again its just a small quirk that I find helps.

Anyway have a great day …

Trauma survivors live in a multiverse , where every possibility might happen.